Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I love working with big insurance carriers. I love it even more that I'm supposed to work with one go-between-type-giggy-firm, and I can never quite tell when a circumstance requires the broker or the carrier...I'm sometimes a little fuzzy on the difference between the two, also. Additionally, it helps not that I work for a company owned by a parent corporation in Sweden, with US headquarters in Connecticut that employs THOUSANDS (well, presently) of people within the country...and that sometimes the carriers...go-betweens...whatever, get confused about who we are, who I am, and what the love is supposed to happen with our particular program. Add OLD insurance issues to the mix, beat wildly, bake at 400 degrees for about 45 minutes in a building adjacent to a huge field on day when the fertilizer smell is overwhelming until the shell is completely burnt, hardended and beyond salvage, and voila, a perfectly frustrating day!

There's the old addage, "Things are not always as they seem." I realize first hand that simple questions to one individual may not alway be so easy to another. For instance, how do I remove a terminated employee from a particular plan? A plan where the ins and outs have not been fully disclosed. A plan where, believe it or not, all those who enrolled for it last year stayed on it and none of them were terminated...it went beautifully like clock-work. It was magic. This year, after lay-offs, etc. we face new challenges with individuals being forced to walk away from said plan...well, the removal process...not so magic. I asked the carrier apparently using addresses of people who were no longer with them...I was a hair shy of sending a mass email to company with the disclaimer that I was looking for THE ONE, you know? The ONE who would know. The ONE who would understand me. The ONE who could answer my very detailed, intricate question. HOW THE BLOODY LOVE DO I REMOVE THIS PERSON?!!? Please, my kingdom for this employee to GET OFF MY PLAN!!! No one can tell me. Now, mind you, the last few days have offered a comprehensive education in how to convert the employee from one kind of plan to another, but I NEVER ASKED HOW TO CONVERT THE EMPLOYEE!!!! So, clearly, simply...asking how to perform a task like removing someone is not as clear, not as simple as I perceive...I'm guessing that if it were as simple as I thought it would be, I would know how to pull it off right now as I write. But alas, I don't. Lucky me, I have a few more days to threaten, mock, complain and eye-roll over the situation.

So my point is this, even when you think things are easy, don't be surprised if the simple things get snagged because it's too convoluted to understand...likewise, don't be surprised if the quantum mechanics go on without a hitch. Apparently, everyone involved in the complex details speak the same language.



joyous said...

Hahahahaha!!! You have such a way of putting things. ;)

Tara said...

I could hardly understand it so I don't speak that language ;). Sounds like a nightmare - but you're the toughest, great lady I know.

Autumn said...

My head feels like a ceiling fan now. What was that about?